I recently went through an unwanted divorce. The experience was destructive, painful and horrifying, and I wanted to know why, so I kept digging. I found many writers willing to offer reasons why marriages “inexplicably” fail, but nearly all of them blamed the men, saying that they didn’t take care of their wife’s emotions well enough and so the men ultimately were the problem. A moment’s careful thought will make it clear to anyone with sense that this is impossible – no one can control the emotions of another.
Blaming men did not ring true to me. Women nodding their heads by the millions and claiming their husbands “just didn’t get it” did not add up to divorce, certainly not in my case, and even more so for the millions of divorces that happen every year. There was no abuse, no violence. The divorce was clearly emotional. Statistics collected over the years by people studying divorces showed that the majority of divorces happened for emotional, not behavior, reasons.
Eventually I found sources that did ring true, and began to understand what had actually happened. I also came to understand that what happened to me had also happened to millions of other men, and had been happening for more than forty years (and still is happening today). I chose to assemble the best available information, practices and wisdom in a boiled-down, easy to understand seminar format to help men avoid this common horror as efficiently as possible. The seminars I give are the result. It is my sincere hope that men use the knowledge and wisdom I provide to become their own marriage experts and live better, happier lives.
Balanc Acts, Ltd.